An extensive response to last week's Farnbach letter

To the Bowdoin Community:

   It's a good thing I'm writing this, instead of talking, because you might be distracted by the robotic click that emits from the cephalic end of my body every five seconds. That's the sound of my programmed grey matter that some would call a brain. Lots of people around here have one. Apparently, I fit into that category with about 99% of the student body. If you could be so kind, readers, as to wait one second while I find my head, the following response may be of some interest to you. I wouldn't have read last week's Letter to the Community if my roommate hadn't pointed it out to me. Thankfully, I did. As my eyes moved closer to the bottom of the page, I found myself growing increasingly angrier. Like giant, pulsing forehead- vein-angry. One of the first things the author, Dan Farnbach, mentions, is that for every "pissed-off" student like himself, who "actually bothers to articulate his or her thoughts," there are probably fifty or even 500 more who do not. Well, I'm pissed off.
   Here's your articulation, in ten delicate points.

1: Compliments to the Instigator
   I recently caught myself mentioning to a friend that I am tired of reading stuff that is meant to appeal to generally everyone; works that are chock full o' qualifications and disclaimers. It is much more intriguing and thought-provoking, in my mind, to read something that either catapults me into the realm of eureka or pisses me off to the point where I'm a walking nuclear warhead. Dan Farnbach writes beautifully, and clearly articulates his point, which makes it difficult for the reader to argue with him. His argument is strong because it invokes a powerful emotional response. But it's time for my cent-and-a-half.

2: Conspiracy Theory
   The fundamental flaw in Farnbach's argument is his description of the fundamental flaw of this school. Mr. Farnbach has not succeeded in convincing me that Bowdoin is simply a conspiratory institution founded upon bogus notions of societal normatives. I cannot buy into the argument that we, as Bowdoin students, are tacitly consenting to corruption by such an institution; that we are conformist flocks of sheep, bleating our way to the butcher to be shorn, flayed, and served on the dinner table of "real life." I will not accept the vision that 99% of Bowdoin students walk around with their craniums stuck in an extremely uncomfortable place, and, by that, I don't mean the back of a Volkswagen. Perhaps I am defeating my own purpose in writing this; my criticism of Mr. Farnbach's letter may be as close-minded as his statements. Or maybe my head is just stuck up my ass.

3: Cynicism vs. Romanticism
   Dan is correct in his statement that he is not the only frustrated student at this school. As long as we're into generalizing, I believe we can categorize the majority of students here (probably everywhere) within two schools of thought. These can be used to describe those who find themselves in a perpetual state of frustration with their surroundings: cynicism and romanticism. Forget Republicans and Democrats. The cynics feel an impending sense of doom with most things in life, and therefore choose to make fun of anything, expressing their discontent. Romantics simply try to imagine everything idealistically. Both are equally not happy with their present situation. And then there are those of us (I am a prototypical example) who are 50% cynical and 50% romantic. But the point here is to realize that being frustrated with one's surroundings I think stems more from how one naturally approaches or views life, not from the surroundings themselves.

4: The Liberal Arts Rap
   Mockery of the idea of the liberal arts institution is hinted at in the "Letter to the Community", however, no more a liberal solution is offered. If we are to think liberal, then we must still respect and accept the possibilities of everything, not simply our personal idea of how things should be done. We are not forced into anything we don't want to do. No one holds a weapon to our head (or other valuable parts of our bodies) and tells us we have to go to college, and that once we're there, we have to live our lives as robots, droning from one academic building to the next, and then droning back home. There are those who put their work before friends and other social activities, and those who put social lives before work. Those who find themselves jaded by the so-called "flood of useless work" perhaps are more vulnerable to the possibility of being affected by such compulsory requirements and inadvertently bring such a condition upon themselves. What does this all lead to? We are old enough to make our own choices. This isn't "The Faculty."

5: Ripping It Apart
   Mr. Farnbach is presuming his expertise on the workings of society and abstract schools of thought that institutionalize human actions. I accuse him of a grave faux pas of contemporary opinion writing-something we all do-making a big, fat, hairy generalization. Such as the criticism of those who wish to be on time: "...the rapidity with which students leave class for sports practices and athletic activities." Although I suffer from the affliction of perpetual tardiness, I cannot look down upon those whose lives revolve around schedules set up for organizational purposes. Most normal people have to do that. Or...is that the problem? Is normal a bad thing? Perhaps Dan will feel I am missing his point...that, if I understood it correctly, people are more concerned with the next "waste of time" on their schedule than caring enough about the class they just left to stay and ask questions. Or maybe it's the alleged anorexia epidemic that drives us to the exercise room. Forget the energizing, healthy feeling one gets from a good workout. That's all a lie, too. THEY'RE ALL GONNA LAUGH AT YOU!!!! Lest I forget to mention insensitivity to eating disorders may fall under the category of having one's head stuck up one's ass.

6: A Few Questions of My Own
   Mr. Farnbach premeditated a response from "athletes and do-gooders" in defense of the athletics programs and clubs which the school offers. I'm not even going to begin what could turn into a lengthy discourse on why these things aren't "a waste of time". What I can provide is a question: who are we to say that what someone else likes to do is a waste of time? Why do we care, if it makes them happy? Seems a simple enough question to me.

7: Defending the System
   What really cracked me up were the comments about what "happens to a student" once he or she matriculates at Bowdoin. For reference: "...the school begins to wear you down. They have you sign up, almost randomly at first, for four classes a semester...between [all the work], students are spread so thin...that the main thing we are learning is how to juggle responsibilities and appear prepared". Sounds like a typical matriculation week to me. Maybe we should restructure firstyear orientation into a sort of hallucinogen-influenced-naked-on-the-quad-student-faculty-affair, during which everyone shares their higher state of existence. Actually, now that I said it, it doesn't sound like a bad idea to me. But seriously (that was a joke, by the way), this is a destruction of the very ideals of why higher academic institutions exist in the first place. By attending Bowdoin and participating in traditional administrative procedures, am I conforming to a terrible conspiracy by accepting such notions? I'd like to hope not, but is it really that horrible if I am?

8: Something my mom would say
   So, work conflicts with a "rounded social existence"? I'll buy that, to some degree. But I'll also bring up the idea that one determines the amount of work one does by choice of major, by choice of course, and by choice of whether on not to spend time on work or hang out with people. If you're pre-med, you go into it knowing that you're going to have to take orgo, and you make that choice to commit to it. Of course, there is always the unfortunate exception of those who are strongly encouraged by outside influences to follow certain tracks of study, and to those, I apologize for my statements. But for everything else, I see very clearly the amount of power we have in making that choice. There's no conspiracy involved. Being unsure of what you're doing is no reason to not sign up for another semester and buy into Bowdoin's "mythological greatness." Being unsure of what you're doing leaves open the possibility for change, and Heaven forbid we are open-minded. That might screw up the 99% statistic.

9: Something to Think About
   Apparently we are also "procrastinating the living of our lives." I see pretty much no evidence for this. I can only come to the conclusion that we cannot possibly begin to know the depths of one's thoughts, other than our own, and even then we have a hard time figuring ourselves out, so how, then, could we ever criticize someone for the way they choose to live their life? In short, it is impossible to ever really know what someone's deal is. If it doesn't directly affect us, why must we concern ourselves with whether or not someone is wasting his or her time with "bunk" extracurricular activities and too much school work? Or other stuff? To me, spending time figuring out how much everyone else sucks instead of figuring yourself out seems an ass-ostrich move, no?

10: My Conclusion
   I guess that's the end of my food for thought. I went into this response with the intention of paying full respect to Mr. Farnbach's letter, while at the same time stating clearly the problems I saw in it. I realize that I may have misinterpreted a few points in his letter, depending on his original intent for the reader. So be it. However, in responding to the letter, I agree with Farnbach on one aspect: I'm pissed off, and I'm articulating my thoughts. I also realize that there's no way everyone will agree with everything I have to say. I'm not trying to appeal to everyone. I just wanted to take this opportunity to speak in opposition to the criticism of the student body. I can only speak from personal experience here because I cannot begin to know everyone on this campus, and I cannot even come up with a generalization that applies to the entire student body. But from what I've observed, everyone I've met here has something to offer. Everyone I've met is passionate about something, and that something is manifested in an infinite number of ways. Whether we realize our passion yet or not is the main question, and perhaps that's what we're ultimately here to find out. Who knows. We all do our own thing, and we all continue to throw frisbees on the quad. No one's walking around with spirals in their eyes.
   This place only jades you as much as you let it jade you.

   Lauren McNally '03

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