Volume CXXXIII, Number 13 January 25, 2002 f

All good on the hardwood
MIKE NORTHROP
STAFF WRITER

It's five-on-five; time to run and gun. A new season, the players are hungry, and everyone is 0-0. My team is back; I should say 'our' team-no disrespect to the fellas-and we ready. Are you? The Playground Legendz return to the floor, fresh from a three-on-three championship season. What, you've never heard of three-on-three basketball? Well it's legit. No refs, so it's not for the faint of heart, but we got scorekeepers.

Life is tough being a baller. I don't mean the travel (it's damn cold walking to those gyms in Febuary) or the expenses (we play for free, you know), but the attention off the court is overwhelming sometimes. I mean, at every party I go to, they got a keg of good beer and honeys on the dance floor shakin their thang. What, you want me to sign my name where? Sometimes I just wanna chill ya know, but everywhere I go, they be throwin' these parties. One nice thing is that I usually have to wait in line for only like ten minutes, okay, fifteen, tops-but no more. Swish baby, eeunce, eeunce, eeunce.

You've got certain obligations with celebrity status at Bowdoin, as all IMers know. We got to be here and there and do this and that; it really cuts into our practice time. In fact, hell, we don't even practice, we're so damn busy. But that's why we work so hard in the offseason, pushing each other, right guys? Like EG-Money, this dude on my team, has a problem with conditioning, so I'd call him up and motivate him. Don't go Shawn Kemp on my ass dawg. The Big Hungry, for three!

Anyway, as tough as it is to be a baller here at Bowdoin, we guys will always find freedom on the courts. That's why we play the game. It's all good on the hardwood.

(italics) Stay tuned next week, as five-on-five gets under way...