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Volume CXXXI, Number 24 |
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It's been fun, it's been boring, it's been educational...
HUGH HILL
COLUMNIST
Well this will be my last column EVER for this lovely little
rag known as the Orient. Before the celebration begins, I want to deliver
my dying curse upon this institution that has swallowed four years of
my youth. Damn you Bowdoin! You've ruined my life, my tan, my sex appeal,
and my mental stability. I've been crushed, and my spirit's corpse lies
at your feet. You shall PAY! Damn YOU!
That was fun. Hehehe. No really, it was. In addition to
my departing curse, I would also like to offer a little reflection upon
the changes I have seen in my four years here. So grab a pillow, and get
ready for some serious attempts at geezing on my part (it gets funny by
the end).
When I first came to this college, political debate here
was rather dead. Granted the echoes of the political correctness movement's
attempts at mind control, thankfully vanquished, were still being felt,
but apathy was the word of the day.
Appalled, I would write ludicrous columns just to see if
I could push any buttons and get a response. Sometimes, I even got one.
Just to show you how whacky things were, one Bowdoin professor called
me "Bowdoin's most dangerous conservative," because I dared
pose a difficult question to a famous "liberal" visiting lecturer.
It is sad when someone voicing a dissenting opinion is branded
a conservative. Come on liberals, throughout our history we have been
the dissenting opinion. I know Bowdoin provides a skewed lens of the dominance
of one view of liberalism, but that does not preclude the value of or
remove the necessity for dissent.
We're getting better after the PC witch hunt, but I still
am bothered by the fact that it is easier to express a broader range of
opinions in front of conservatives today than liberals. Their time in
the wilderness (a.k.a. the 60s and 70s) did the conservatives some good
as it taught them the lesson liberals learned centuries ago, to tolerate
diverse opinions. At the risk of being facetious, liberals, open your
minds!
The level of discussion on this campus is definitely rising.
When I came here, this lovely publication was the only one. Now, we have
The Patriot and the Disorient raising the level, volume, and multiplicity
of perspectives on this campus. Discussion is progress.
Don't get me wrong, we're still quite apathetic. Yet some
progress is being made. I think this is a result of both social evolution
and a changing student body.
Lamentably, people are partying less (according to insider
information, 25 percent fewer kegs were consumed at this year's Ivies
compared to last year). Many will applaud the reduced alcohol consumption,
but there is a definite downside to the social slowdown on campus. Gone
are the days when the entire campus went to one giant party at a frat
house. There is no unified campus social life, one of the great possibilities
at a school this size.
Our campus is fragmenting socially as students, banned from forming some
voluntary associations (fraternities), groping about to form their own
associations based on shared interests. The school's ham-handed attempt
at social engineering known as the social house system has only contributed
to the further balkanization of the student body (note the troubles faced
in filling many of the houses this year).
I can offer no solution other than for the administration
to treat the students like adults and let them govern their own social
lives. I don't see much future in the current system, so underclassmen,
it falls to you to scrap the social houses and replace them with something
more workable. Good luck.
As for me, I'm out of here. In four years, I've made amazing
friends, experienced brilliant faculty, and tried new and zesty things.
There's also still a lot I have not done. You'd think with only 1600 kids
you could do it all in four years, right? Hardly.
Yet I'm ready to go. I'm sick of too much bureaucracy and
administration (though I don't think I'm ever going to escape that, at
least it won't be so pervasive in my personal life).
It's also frickin' freezing and the sun hides for three
months. I've said it once and I'll say it a thousand times: we need to
come here during the summer when we can experience Maine when it's nice.
Bowdoin College, I bid you adieu. It's been fun, it's been
boring, it's been educational, sometimes downright depressing, and sometimes
just right. I can't say college was what I expected it to be, and sure,
I'd do things differently if I could, but I can't. Thus, I leave you with
the phrase an annoying kid in my high school used to say: "It's been
real," because here it has largely been everything but.
P.S. You ain't seein' DIME ONE out of me in donations until you comply with the following demands: 1) Change Thorne back to Wentworth: If your name only stays up for a few decades what's the point in giving? 2) Give the rugby team more money and less grief; 'nuff said. 3) Add lashings as an acceptable punishment and get rid of that weak-kneed social probation crap. 4) Rename Res Life "Party Facilitation Office": Register a keg? Hell, kid, we're given 'em away this weekend! 5) Declare war on Colby: They'll never suspect what hit 'em until it's too late. 6) Build secret, underground Batcaves around campus and connect them with The Stowe Memorial Underground Monorail System for student use. If they can spend close to a million on some junky lights and mobiles for Thorne, they sure as heck can do this. 7) Never force two people to live in the doubles in Chamberlain: after freshman year, that's downright torture and I'm still scarred from the experience.