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Volume CXXXII, Number 19 |
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A lite taste of victory
JASON LONG
HUMOR COLUMNIST
I would like to extend my warmest thanks and appreciation to Brunswick's finest eatery, Thorne Dining Hall, for the improved assortment of salad dressings. For the six people that read my article, you may recall that earlier this semester I expressed a peculiarly strong desire for lite ranch salad dressing. When I arrived for my first post-break dinner at Thorne, right after pouring lite caesar dressing on my salad (as I had become accustomed of doing), it was pointed out to me that perhaps I should take a second look through the sneeze guard. I was so happy I nearly cried.
The Holy Grail of salad dressings, lite ranch, is now available at Thorne Dining Hall. I am not so presumptuous to suggest that my article or countless comment cards was the driving factor behind the salad bar upgrade, however I must admit a somewhat groundless sense of victory. After all, I had a lite ranch salad for lunch today. Taste's like victory to me. This is a testament to the responsive and considerate nature of Bowdoin's Dining Services. Kudos.
If this development has done anything, it has confirmed that Bowdoin does care about all of us. It is encouraging to know, but now I am motivated to point out other tender issues in campus life that could and should be resolved. Perhaps the most obvious debacle right now is the parking situation on campus.
As a freshman I did not have a car, because, well, I wasn't cool. Yet, one has to admit not having a car freshman year really can be a blessing. I remember watching icicles melt off of a friend's nose after hiking back from the parking lot in sub-zero weather. You need a car just to get to the parking lot.
This really isn't the College's fault; call it a hunch, but parking probably wasn't a concern in 1843, however 2003 isn't so simple. Parking is a real problem on campus, yet more and more students are bringing their cars and confounding the problem. No matter what OPEC does, gas just doesn't get too expensive for Bowdoin students.
I am not suggesting we pave over the quad to make parking spaces, but given the limited number of spaces available, perhaps the College shouldn't have made a trailer park out of the Moulton Union parking lot. As if the blinking red light on the crane in front of our chapel isn't ugly enough, now I am greeted each morning by that bleak white trailer. I respect that the construction crew needs office space, but why couldn't the College sacrifice some space elsewhere, perhaps in an existing building? Why not Curtis Pool? Other than Summer Programming using that space, the college avoids the building like its haunted.
And how about that pothole in front of Moulton Union? It is the size of
a Jacuzzi; I actually saw a car fall in it yesterday. Can we please try
to fill that thing in before it turns into a fault line? I know, I know;
I shouldn't be so cranky. Yet, so long as people keep reading I will keep
writing and hope for the best. In the mean time, I am enjoying the best
salads a man can ask for.
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