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Volume CXXXIII, Number 13 |
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A race to the gutter
PAT ROCKEFELLER
COLUMNIST
Wardrobe malfunction, eh, Justin? The, ahem, "malfunction" of Janet Jackson's bustier got a certain set of people to complaining about indecency during "family hour" on television. The FCC is launching an investigation into the MTV-produced halftime show and what Michael Powell, chair of the FCC, called a "classless, crass and deplorable stunt." This resulted in another set of people, including an uncharacteristically un-angry Howard Dean, complaining that it's just body parts-who cares? An investigation is silly. Bush knew!
They did it, we know they did it, and if they broke the rules, fine them. End of story. Generally, there's a time and a place for most things, but 8:00 p.m. during halftime-the part of the game most geared toward kids-of the most watched television event in the United States just isn't it. I would have expected this from Fox, perhaps-home of Temptation Island and When Animals Attack-but CBS is a virtual retirement community. Its average viewer could have voted for FDR.
The infuriating part of it all is that the whole incident only proves that all those involved were either exceedingly stupid themselves, or just figured that the rest of us were. It was not a "wardrobe malfunction," Timberlake, you ripped her top off. Janet, that was a very decorative adornment to be wearing if this wasn't planned. MTV, you promised a "shocking moment" during Jackson's half time show. Don't insult us by claiming that the "shocking moment" was going to be the appearance of Justin Timberlake. The man is omnipresent these days. The appearance of Justin Timberlake is as shocking as John Kerry referencing his service in Vietnam.
CBS, what the hell did you expect? You let MTV produce your halftime show. CBS officials claimed that they had attended all rehearsals and that there was "no indication any such thing would happen." So, although it was February 1, 2004, Nelly sang his summer of 2002 classic, "It's Getting Hot in Herre, So Take off All Your Clothes." Timberlake's line accompanying the "malfunction" was "Gonna have you naked by the end of this song." Jackson was wearing a snap-on bustier.
A team of drunken monkeys could have foreseen this.
Whoever came up with this stunt knew what would happen. They knew it would shock and offend those who are always shocked and offended. That's been the goal for, and justification of a lot of really bad art for years. Shock the bourgeois. MTV has been the vanguard for this on the pop culture front since its inception. Finding a music video without sexual overtones, if not sex as its explicit focus, is a rarity.
But to tell the truth, I don't give a damn. I don't think most college kids do. We're old enough that we grew up with MTV and therefore have seen it all before, and we're young enough that we don't yet have to worry about television corrupting our children's immortal souls.
Frankly, the stunts are predictable. Oh, the top coming off was a surprise-but only because of where it happened, not that it did happen. For better or worse, sex just isn't shocking to this generation. Forget the "malfunction," the rest of that halftime performance could not have been shown ten years ago. This year, we didn't blink until Timberlake grabbed his Super Bowl souvenir. They got Kid Rock to clean up the lyrics for his performance, but the dancers alone-dressed like extras for the Rocky Horror Picture Show-would have been unacceptable. Pushing the envelope with scandal and sex may still sell (Viacom, which owns MTV and CBS, saw its stock go up Monday morning) but it won't for long. It's just not all that creative anymore. Offensive or not, as artistic expression it's played out. In fact, it's lazy. And instead of promoting new and creative ways of expressing thoughts and emotions, it promotes more laziness.
For example, Christina Aguilera has joined Nelly in adding random "r's" to words to better express her meaning. Dirty is now Dirrty. Here is now Herre. Cleverr, you two. Innovation in language is fine. Shakespeare did a lot of it, coming up with new words and phrases, but just adding an "r" to prove you don't just mean dirty, but really dirty is simply stupid. You have the music video to show just how dirty you are.
As record companies complain that file sharing is ruining their business, they should perhaps consider whether bad artistry is playing a part in their slacking sales. Most pop music is clich‚d and I'm fine with that. The problem is that the only way to distinguish one artist from another is stunts and antics, which generally result in a race to the gutter. Sex is a cheap lure, but a thoroughly unoriginal one. I'm hoping those million-dollar ad campaigns come up with something new, because as long as we're going to hell in a handbasket, I'd like to request a nicer handbasket.
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