The Bowdoin Orient

Out there in the world, the economic crisis looms bleaker every day. Both Wall Street and Maine Street are feeling the effects of our Titanic-esque economy. Even Bowdoin is beginning to bend under the pressure: our foundation of a fitness center is suddenly short on funds and athletic teams can't have overnight stays anymore. There's one thing that hasn't changed, however: condoms are still free.

During times of economic downturn or societal stress, sex can be something that people use as an inexpensive alternative to going to the movies or taking a road trip. A recent poll published in BBC News showed that 45 percent of Brits rated sex above both window shopping and gossiping as their favorite way to pass the time during the current economic crisis. Though I haven't found a comparable American study yet, I would bet that the numbers are similar. Though the objective of this poll is slightly murky, it still has some implications for the way we think about sex.

Though American culture is far from being the most sexually liberal, we are still becoming more and more conditioned to sex and sexual images. We see sexually suggestive ads everywhere trying to sell everything from beer to gum to television shows. Most movies can't even hold the attention of a teenage audience without at least a semblance of sex scene (I mean, sparks were flying even in "Wall-E"). Sex is all around us, and now, apparently, it's on its way to becoming America's favorite free pastime.

I am personally all for a more sexually liberated society, but it does make me nervous: I'm not concerned about any loss of innocence, but rather a loss of intimacy.

When sex begins to be treated as something that's marketable or solely for fun, we risk losing one of the best parts of sex. You can read all the guidebooks you want (I would recommend "The Guide to Getting it On") but nothing will compare to a partner who you like and who cares about you. Intimacy doesn't necessarily mean marriage, nor does it necessarily mean a relationship, but rather a real connection with your partner. Having lots of sex doesn't equate to having good sex, and sleeping with someone who you're not into or who isn't into you can be a pretty lackluster experience. Having sex also doesn't create intimacy. Sleeping with someone can make you more attached to them, but it won't necessarily make you like them more. And you can be incredibly intimate with someone without ever sleeping with them.

This doesn't mean that sex with someone random or someone who you're not that into doesn't have its place. It can be really frustrating to be single, and if you can't find Mr. or Ms. Right, sometimes your best move is to make do with Mr. or Ms. Right Now. Constantly settling for so-so experiences, however, can make it difficult to remember what it's like when things really click with someone. We should be allowed to sleep with or not sleep with whomever we want whenever we want?but we should also be allowed to ask for more than just sex. We should be allowed to ask for great sex, which comes with being seriously intimate with a partner.

So as we go through college seeking ways to entertain ourselves, I hope that Bowdoin students keep in mind that sex is even more fun with someone you really care about. Physical connections are only bolstered by emotional connections. Have all the sexual experiences that you want, but when you think about really, really excellent sex, don't forsake the intimacy of it. It's hard to take intimacy into consideration when we're busy watching hot people fall into bed over bottles of Budweiser Lime on TV, but in real life it's an important part of good sex. And if sex is on its way to becoming America's new pastime, I hope that we can all think of it with the passion with which true Red Sox fans hate the Yankees. Put that much feeling into a relationship, and it's bound to be earth-shattering.

• IN FEATURES THIS WEEK...
• From New York to Maine: The origins of Bowdoin food
• Sixth annual ‘Longfellow Days’ celebrates earth, sea and sky
• Web site data analytics reveal Athletics pages get most hits
• In honor of sex, love and passion: The more the merrier
• At the judge's table: Disregard entrées, pass us the sides!